I have read though the responses. I want to agree that kids under 13 with Facebook is a grey area. I am a Facebook user but my children are not. I know kids are online. Why? Cause their friends or cousins have it, the team connects that way, everyone else is. Are those good reasons? It probably depends on geography for the family line. But the others - well that's a good question. I think that is a question that parents are letting the kids answer on their own. Is there blame? No. Why? Because parents are even more lost than their kids when it comes to the fast paced world of internet living. I was reading an article this morning from thewirecutter.com 'Happiness takes a little magic'. It made me think about how connected our culture in Darien really is. The worker has email up all the time, checking the news or market. The mom is checking the schedule is practice on or off, are we carpooling, who's sick. The kids are checking the log for homework, typing papers and creating presentations to post back to school. We are living connected. What are the kids seeing? They want to be just like us! They want to get plugged in too. That could be Facebook or Google+. I think the education curve of the entire family needs to improve. That is why I am in this class, again, and I'll take it every year! Why? Because I talk to people about what I learn and encourage them to join me on this journey. Because this is just like shopping or going to the gym. It's part of life and we have to do it! So kids on Facebook? Well they want what they see us doing. So talk about it. Tell them what rules you have for your self. Be prepared for repeating your self becuase they have friends talking to them too. It's all in the conversation! Sometimes that is easier advice to give than to do but communicate as a parent with real life knowledge and they will hear you, just maybe not the first time.

I don't think kids under 13 should have a Facebook account because of the addictive nature of the interface. They do not have the maturity to control their impulses. Recently, I have seen many articles written about how college students have friends basically lock them out of their accounts by changing their passwords, so they can study for finals. If kids are on Facebook all the time, they are not using their time productively, not to mention the personal information that they are now inadvertently pouring into the public domain.

Years ago, it was not cool for middle school kids to Facebook in Darien. But now, it seems that most of the middle school kids have a Facebook account. Too bad. Most kids this age are not able to navigate a site like this without divulging personal information and/or inadvertently hurting the feelings of others. I'd rather the middle school kids start with sites like Tumbler, than Facebook.

It does seem that Facebook is a commercial venture designed to data mine (all those "polls"!). One of the reasons I love the idea of 21 Things is because it is introducing us to new literacies. Just as children must learn to read and surf selectively and cautiously, they also must learn to operate safely in a digital world. Part of that literacy is learning how and why things operate and what control you have, or don't. Families learning together seems the safest route.

While I think Facebook is a great way to catch up with current friends and friends from the past, I would be crazy to think that Facebook was established for this sole reason. Facebook, in my opinion, was established to data mine. Full disclosure, I am a Facebook user, but I am extremely careful with what I post. With that in mind, I do not think children under the age of 13 have the capacity to determine what is/isn't acceptable to post. Children can unknowingly invite a child predator by posting their whereabouts, their phone numbers/address and other personal information. Once a child is of a responsible age for a Facebook account, I agree that he/she should set their account up with an adult, provide their parent with the password, and "friend" their parent. I also think parents should have certain rules-- such as keeping the computer in a public room and equipping the computer with parental controls.

Personally, I don't think kids should have a Facebook profile. It seems that there is too little control over what gets posted, especially among children and teens who have little impulse control or understanding of the dangers of posting certain things. That said, I realize that facebook is a major social force among teens and even a place for teams and study groups to connect, so older teens may need an account to some extent. But then parents have to be vigilant about checking their child's account. They should be on their child's friend list and have their child's password so they can ensure they aren't being excluded from seeing certain posts. They should also talk to their children about how to avoid conflicts online by using nice words and not posting about others, etc.